For the most part, I've been fortunate: I've lived a relatively peaceful life compared to my turbulent childhood. I've accomplished most of what my younger self viewed as the best case scenario for this stage of my life; whether that holds out for the remaining 10 ~ 60 Years that I should have left to live, one can at least hope the rest of life is pretty decent.
But sometimes I think over my life, and I wonder if I may have missed the most important parts of what I wished my life would be by now.
This is less a fear of missing out, and more like a longing for something missing. I've probably
missed out on more them a few thing since I was born, but don't really care about most of what comes to mind. rather it's like some wires are in my system, but have insufficient connection at the other end. Or as I like to think of it: some things don't really have a concrete answer, or one will only be forthcoming in heaven, if at all.
Sigh, there are some things that can't really be planned, just as they have no concrete answers in the world.
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