Saturday, August 30, 2008

Chronicling the Failures of DRM
Take yourself back to the days when everyone bought only CDs. Imagine what you'd have thought of a store that sold discs that might work on your CD player now, but weren't guaranteed to work on next year's models. Imagine that some required you to phone the music store on a regular basis to reassure them that you were the legitimate owner, and were that store to go under, all the CDs you bought from it would one day cease playing. And once you started buying music from this store, you found yourself locked into a system that discouraged you from buying from a rival store down the street. Why, you might think, would you have bought anything from a place like that? Well, if you're like millions of people in the UK, there's a strong chance you already have.

All I can say is, "Burn, baby burn !!!"

I wouldn't call MP3 an open format by any chance, but the article is interesting. DRM in my humble opinion is just a load of crap. Because anyone it is meant to actually stop, is more then smart enough (or equipped to) circumvent it one way or the other. That's actually one reason why I rarely buy music, my opinion that the companies making the most money off of it. Won't be happy until they've eventually figured out a way to charge someone four times for the same thing, then work on the next big thing, PayPerPlay hahah !!

I generally preer to have music on CD, because it lasts longer. Heh, I'd probably prefer vinyl if it was practical, but that's a different story ^_^. Generally when I listen to music, it's always on the computer. And I'm much to lazy to flick Audio CD's around all day >_>

Yippie-Kay-Yay Micro$oft SFU !!!

Test one: I wonder if Console is a decent replacement for cmd.exe 's terminal emulator --- It is

Test two: I wonder if the SFU pdksh can do completion? --- It can, just had to find the 'bind' commands for it

Test three: I wonder if SFU's pdksh will work with my %PATH% --- it did

Problem one: SFU pdksh seems to require the formal name, e.g. 'foo.exe' for programs outside of it's regular path and runwin32's search path --- That's ok, I don't mind much and can alias out stuff like flock.

Problem two: Because SFU follows the unix-style of open it, see if there is a she-bang line (e.g. #!/bin/sh) saying what to run it with, else pass it on to the shell.... It feeds .bat files into it's pdksh unless they are manually executed, e.g. 'runwin32 cmd /C foo.bat' --- that is bad, several programs I use wrap themselves in 'batch' files on Windows and 'shell' scripts on Unix.

Problem three: My universal bourne-based shrc (~/.${USER}_shrc) sets itself to the current Bourne-style shell (e.g. sh, bash, ksh-family, zsh) and Operating System (e.g. BSD, Linux, generic Unix) needs to inspect the $SHELL environment variable to determin what shell to set stuff for. --- For some odd reason the SFU pdksh doesn't seem to set SHELL !!!! To top it off, $USER is not set, but at least the Windows var: %USERNAME% is converted to $USERNAME.

Fix for problem one:
$ mkdir /dev/fs/P/bin      # creates P:\bin
$ touch && chmod +x
$ vi

for CMD in `echo $PATH | sed 's/:/ /g' | awk '{ print $0 }'`
        for EXE in `ls $CMD`; do
                echo $EXE | grep -E '.*\.exe$' > /dev/null && \
                        ln -s ${CMD}/${EXE} ${BINDIR}/`echo $EXE | sed 's/\.exe$//g'` && echo "made link for:  ${CMD}/$EXE"

$ ./
   ....     # symlinks all foo.exe in $PATH to /dev/fs/P/bin/foo

Fix for problem two:

Launch a new session of cmd.exe through windows (e.g. not via SFU; use the run dialog, start menu, or desktop /or quicklaunch icon).

U:\Terry> echo %PATH% >

Return to SFU korn shell (pdksh):

$ touch && chmod +x
$ vi


make_wrapper() {
        [ -e $2 ] && return     # file exists, no wrapper needed
        local MYFILE=`basename $2`
        cd $BINDIR && [ ! -e $MYFILE ] && touch $MYFILE

        echo '#/bin/sh' >> $MYFILE
        echo 'exec cmd /C "set PATH=`cat ~/` && `basename $0`"' >> $MYFILE

        echo "${BINDIR}/$MYFILE created"

for CMD in `echo $PATH | sed 's/:/ /g' | awk '{ print $0 }'`
        for EXE in `ls $CMD`; do
                echo $EXE | grep -E '.*\.bat$' > /dev/null && \
                        make_wrapper ${CMD}/${EXE} "${BINDIR}/`echo $EXE | sed 's/\.bat$//g'`"

$ ./
   ... makes wrapper shell scripts in /dev/fs/P/bin/ for all foo.bat in $PATH

The wrapper scripts this creates look like this:

Terry@SAL1600-$ cat bin/irb

exec cmd /C "set PATH=`cat ~/` && `basename $0`"


it's neccessary to set the Windows %PATH% before launch, so it can execute the program --- using the path from the invocation environment won't work, e.g. /dev/fs/P/Devel/Langauges/Ruby/bin/irb in SFU Shells but this woudl translate to CurrentDriveLetter:\dev/fs/P/Devel/Langauges/Ruby/bin/irb which won't work. Note, the program must be executed as P:\Devel\Languages\Ruby\bin\irb.bat in Windows cmd shell, as that is where it is located on my system.

Fix for problem three:

I modified my ~/.profile from OpenBSD to take care of the $USER and $SHELL issues, which is also nice enough to load my custom initialization file.

$ vi .profile

export TERM HOME
SHELL="/dev/fs/P/Utilities/Services_For_UNIX/bin/ksh"; export SHELL

echo "Waiting for screen repaint...."
sleep 2
echo 'Korn power !!!'


I set the path to the physical rather then the /bin/ksh 'shorty' in SFU, so that if I later find any compatibility issues, I can always work around it 'specifically' if necessary.

I'm not sure if it is a problem with the Console2-Devel build I've installed or with how SFU's korn shell expects to run. But a few seconds after startup the prompt disappears as if from a 'clear', giving any I/O that results in a line being drawn causes a fix. Since I haven't figured this part out yet, I've just 'side stepped' the problem. It takes roughly the amount of time to sleep and echo the message before I am returned to my prompt. A quick parse of my $ENV and we're ready to rock and all the output on the Console tab is from my ${USER}_shrc file.

I copied an old version of initialization file and made a quick edit. In the file I check for the systems unix name and use it to record the operating system type. The Services For UNIX subsystem still identifies itself as 'Interix' even though it's been under Microsoft's thumb for a bit.

case `uname -s` in
    'FreeBSD') isFreeBSD=1
               LSCOLORS='CxGxxxxxBxexExcxdx'; export LSCOLORS
               ;; # FreeBSD
    'OpenBSD') isOpenBSD=1;;
    'NetBSD')  isNetBSD=1;;
    'Linux')   isLinux=1;;
    'Unix')    isUnix=1;;
    'Interix') isUnix=1;isSFU=1;;

I want to make a few changes to my shrc, but I don't think they will work *properly* with SFU. My shrc file also pulls in a local 'extension' of itself, called ~/.site_shrc that makes things specific to the current system, for example adding the TexLive binaries to my $PATH on FreeBSD and noting the IP address or doing things that won't work in the shells/v7sh that I use for testing. It looks like I'm going to have to write a site_shrc for Windows hahaha !!!

There's more then one way to skin a cat, and this bloody hoge-podge of an operating system ain't gonna best me !!! I will have a decent CLI interface if I've got to invoke a hex editor...
You know, the more I try to give IDEs a fair chance, the more I find. That in the end, THEY ALL SUCK !!! Either that, or it has proven impossible to find something with even so much as a decent editor that's worth more then notepad or /bin/ed, is it really to much to ask; a decent editor?

Even on Windows XP, where cmd.exe has proven to be the worst damn CLI I've used, *my way* still seems to beat any IDE I've tried, and that is pretty damn sad lol. And so far I have found nothing that bests my personal combo of term+zsh+vim+tools, and tending to the more 'IDE like' features myself >_>. The only bad thing about cmd.exe, is it doesn't have emacs based line editing out of box lol, that and the tab completion works like a kinder garden program compared to bash/tcsh/zsh/pdksh.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Writer's Block: Your Online Hot Spots

Where do you spend most of your time on the web?
Live Journals Writer's Block

I maintain what some might consider a near omni-presence around [SAS], the PC-BSD support forum, and when time permits visit DaemonForums, but over there I very much prefer to read rather then comment.

I have almost non-stop music running on my PC, sometimes I use my local collection. But many of the times I stream radio. 94.9 The Bull is one that I've listened to a lot, but lately I've spent most of my time on thanks to hearing about it. I've set up a station that gives me a nice mixture of the kind of music I like, typically country and rock. Some times I listen to BBC Radio 1, I like some of the stuff they put on but not all of it.

Wikipedia makes up a large amount of my daily web intake. Most often articles related to technology or computer science. I'm really horrible when it comes to Wikipedia, I remember once during research for a history exam. I was looking up something from the 19ths century, I forget what -- but the text book wasn't good enough. By the end of it, I wound up reading about the country of Vietnam lol. The hyperlinks and search ability removes what I hate about book-based encyclopedias, it's easy to find interesting stuff without jumping between many volumes!

When I'm interested in News, I usually check my RSS feeds. Along side my online-stored bookmarks, Flock lists RSS headlines in the my world page. I skim BBC's international edition, because I find it superior to CNNs various offerings. And also to Slash dot, because I can usually find interesting sci-technical tibbits there that I other wise wouldn't hear about. often makes a pass through my web surfing habits, thanks to friends sending me links over AIM lol.

I often use various resources depending on what I'm dong and Google is my search engine, because the results are just better. And unlike other crap (Yahoo, Live search) there is less of a "Is your search engine really this bad, or did most of these results paid to be here?" feeling. Google just works!!! For resources, it ranges from programmer documentation, English-German and English dictionaries, and various software related sites (FBSD ports, sourceforge, etc).

When time permits and I have something to say, I'll usually try to update my LiveJournal. What good is a LJ unless you actually use it? I'd like to update every day or two, but my life's not that interesting. In fact, if I did update it that often, it would be rather depressing lol. The one big problem I have on spending time on the web, is keeping up with my E-Mail lol. I've got over 130mb of largely unread mail piled up, and that is just in my primary box.

Aside from that stuff, I'm usually logged into 5-7 instant messenger accounts and occasionally either a VoIP or IRC based system to boot. Hmm, considering how little HTML I typically use in posts, I wonder if I could cram any more hyperlinks into this post loool.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Writer's Block: The Meaning of Love

What does love mean to you, and why? Have you always felt this way?

Submitted By rynanne
Live Journals Writer's Block

Hmm, a question I've somewhat been pondering since I noticed the entry in the WB/QOTD-block. Mm, what does love mean to me?

I would rather watch the flesh melt off my bones then be without that person.

Perhaps a tad morbid, but particularly apt to the strength required to describe such a thing. In a way, maybe it is that simple as well, for me at least. Because that is generally how I feel. I'm not heroic, I'm not suicidal, but my heart can outweigh good sense -- the people I care for have to make it through whether I do or not, because I wouldn't be able to go on alone.

Any ways:

Love is forgiveness, if you really love someone, can't you bring yourself to leave wrongs aside?

Love is endless, I believe if you truly do love someone; you never stop loving them. At least, if there is a way to stop, I've never found it lol.

Love is blind, each can see the blackest moments of the others life, yet love them just as much. I'm not proud of every moment of my life, nor those of everyone I love, but I still love them. If anyone can't love me in tern, despite such things. Well, unfuck'em lol.

Love goes in both directions. Hmm, I have no idea but for a strange reason, the film Now, Voyager comes to mind. In my opinion, things have to work both ways... Haha, the Dining Philosophers problem comes to mind, I really think I need to get out more >_>.

Love isn't a bed of roses. If you expect to ever get along perfectly with someone in this life, you're positively nuts or dreaming IMHO. Love doesn't just dwell in special moments, but throughout the relationship. From spending time together, to picking up something on the way home, to the most intimate moments, why have any of it unless you loved them? To quote myself, "If I didn't love you, I'd tell you to go fuck off instead"

Love takes many forms, we each love different people in different ways. For example, it would be a bit abnormal to feel the same way about ones best friend as ones spouse, unless they are the same person lol.

When it comes to a more personal point, as in "as I do". Generally, if I love someone, I'll do just about anything within the terms of the law. In some cases, willing to stretch that a bit... Although that's never been necessary (thankfully). Also I'm usually more willing to 'bend' my schedule when needed, at least when it's not consistently a one-way affair. Although I almost never ask such things of others (hell, I don't even ask people to fetch me a drink 99% of times lol), I just don't like being 'monopolized' and won't do it to others. Or as I have told my family on a number of occasions. Only GOD has a right to control my life without my permission, and you're not GOD and you certainly don't have my permission !!!

Mm, one thing that comes to my mind is my parents. As fate would have it, after they got engaged, there was about 20 years difference and 3 marriages between them before they finally got married. Before my father died, they were only together for a few years, but during that time they were very much together. One thing I somewhat regret, is that I never really got to see how they both interacted with one another. Although, odds are if I did, I would've spent the first decade of my life rolling my eyes every day >_>. I very much like spending time with people that I care about when I can. Odds are, if I didn't, I could actually get more done. But that would be a bit selfish. In general, I do generally consider myself self-centered at times. But I do care very deeply about others, I'm just not an extrovert lol. Hanging out with friends and doing something == usually fun, finding a party just for it's own sake != fun (by comparison).

On the more, hmm I guess the romantic side of the coin. To me sharing life is a very important thing in that regard.

My train of thought arguably wonders as far south as any other mans but that's not what I truly desire in life. There is a very big difference between sex and making love, and in this day and age the former is easy to come by compared to the latter. I sometimes warn friends when they get to, uhh 'zealous', too think closer at what they desire. A 'good time' or something lasting -- my definition of a lover goes beyond sex.

I suppose, to put it to words beyond the obvious points ^^, if I ever got married there would have to be a lot more in the relationship then just the physical aspects. I have a very active mind, and life has made me, shall we say, devoid of an intellectual counter part for much of my life. Or as I like to think of it, if bra size exceeds brain size times heart capacity; I'm not prone to being involved for long, I already have to deal with enough stupid people.

My mind comes with me, just the same as my heart and everything else does, and what future would there be unless one could share both?

Although I would say one of my favorite songs among what I would classify as 'love songs', paints a rather optimistic view of things (imho). I really do think of things a bit differently. I guess you could say, it's the difference between a song you'd love to dance to with the woman of your dreams, and what you expect out of the rest of life together ^_^. All in all, I expect I'll probably be single for my entire life; unless GOD has something else in store.... But I guess that's just life. Still, I think that my idea of a 'perfect' moment. Would be to have the love of my life and our children in my arms... That would just be sublime, but I'm to rational a person to count on it happening in my life time.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Todo: Toolkit and Library madness

Examine for portability the following toolkits under these OSes: Windows NT, Mac OSX*, Unix-like.

*I sadly don't have a Mac, although I would really love one. So a OSX binary of some form will have to pass.

GTK+ -- C, C++, Perl, Python, Ruby, PHP, C#.NET (Java bindings also avail but seem to be gnome-centric)

Qt4 -- C++, Perl, Python, Ruby, Java (C#.NET and PHP bindings seem to be questionable and only C++/Python and possibly Java bindings can be depended on).

WxWidgets -- C++, Perl, Python, Ruby, Java, C#.NET

Swing and SWT would be considered if they were available under more languages !!!

Evaluate portable standard/add-on libraries to each language for the following capabilities:

String handling (they all do well in the language standard)
Regular Expressions (Only Perl and Ruby get this great imho)
XML Processing
Network programming -- both sockets based API and protocol support (IMAP, POP, HTTP/S, FTP)
Database handling -- must support MySQL, SQLite, and some form of flat file.
Basic compression and archive format support (e.g. tar; zip; gz; bz2; lzma)\
Inter-Process Communication (IPC) methods and related process control (e.g. fork(), exec(), signal(), kill() type routine-families).
Ease of use and deployment


Build up a standard frame work of toolkits/libraries/etc that are portable across both my general operating environment and the various languages I use

Attempt to standardize myself on few languages rather then rubber banding between various programming languages + sh/awk/sed/friends

Ensure full development environments are available to me under FreeBSD 7 and Windows NT 5.1 (e.g. I can code from either machine and not change tools)

At least one language for scripting/prototyping and one for more efficient execution when implemented in that language (e.g. 1 interpreted + 1 compiled)

and try to stay sane along the way without writing a few libraries in the process >_>
Oh how glad I will be when work is done for the week.....

So I can drown in other work lol.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The years of my life are taking their toll upon my soul. Bit by bit, more slips away.
Sometimes even the strongest light of hope burns dim, unto ash.
*SIGH* watching my wireless connection flubber-band between 6mb/s and 24mb/s at a distance of ~2.5m, I think it's time to go to bed, and download a few api references in the morning....



Even worse stroke of luck, took a break and loaded up XGalaga (a nice Galaga based game), got a powerup of tripple-missle launcher in the first wave, only to lose it seconds later when I took my eyes half off the display lol --> just long enough to zig when I should've zagged ^_^

That's it, I'm going to bed.

Monday, August 25, 2008

A busy day

I was busy trying to catch up a bit with GTK+, I set out to begin making tests of the various language bindings, starting with C++ and Windows; since I know they all work fine under FreeBSD and GNU/Linux. The first thing I did, was download the GTK Development Environment, which proved to be a disaster.

In allowing the installer to "Register Environment Variables", the installed nuked my systems %PATH%. So I've had to reset it, one bit at time. To 'shield' it from any future assaults, I've split it up into other system environment variables that get sucked in. That should at least eep me from having to backup the registry... Once if ever, I actually manage to get the XP machine up to snuff again, I'll need to take a proper backup of the system.

Spent a lot of my time today in training with Jonsi and Caern. First doing training with Jonsi, then dealing with Caern after tending to family business.

I'm omni tasking to the point, that I don't even get to finish LJ Posts loool

Sunday, August 24, 2008

No win situation

Almost to the time where I should be able to code in peace. I'm to damn tired to work alnight, my family is going to make sure I'm not going to be able to code for another several hours, and guess what?

I'm already to damn tired to work at all.

resistance is futile


It's no rat fuckin' use in this place. This morning, I as trying to get ready a few tests to see how GCJ3/4 compared to the compiler J2SE 5.0 in compatilbiity.... Only to facing a living hell from my family. Tonight I tried to sit down and tried to read Programming with gtkmm... Alas, the same problem !!!

Maybe I should just give up learning, programming, computers, [SAS], work, and living life in general: and sit in a corner somewhere, and hope the mother fuckers starve to death before I do... No wait, I'd go first, I get stuck doing to many odds and ends to do otherwise lol. --> I have a strange sense of humour don't I?


The expression I'm feeling, is not one I'm familiar with in English. When translated from Italian to English, it roughly means "Damn the misery" for most intents and purposes; or as some parts of my family would prefer to say it: "mannaggia la miseria!" I however, have no idea how to appropriately express it in English by any other means lol.

Something that has been on my mind of late


I very much need to start standardizing myself on a smaller set of tools. Maybe tools is not the best choice of ord, o much as it is a question of languages and libraries. It's actually kind of ironic, I really would like to learn several more languages (Ada, Fortran, C#, Erlang, and I never did wrap my head around Scheme).



can do low level stuff

can interface well with C code and libraries

Qt is natively C++ and supports everything I need it to run on (in Qt4 OSE hehe)

Fairly portable and standardized (at least much of the 1998 standard...) with several compilers available.

Mainly toolkits and frame works available, both native and from C.

Widely used and my first language


having to dig into lower level interfaces is very error prone when doing it with a headache the size of California.

Often not my first choice for building a prototype *quickly* but good for final implementation.



Inheritable portable between JVMs of the same implementation (e.g. Sun JVM for Win and Sun VM for Mac can run same code).

Simpler OOP syntax then C++, imho

The Swing GUI toolkit is fairly portable and SWT sufficiently supports the platforms I want to avoid skipping.

I like the way it handles exceptions, and usually like checked exceptions -- when a class is designed appropriately.

It's well defined if not perfectly standardized and compliant implementations are fairly common enough (Sun's)

Wildly used and my third language.

Well documented (if a bit boring)


Everything is OOP....

I prefer native code to waiting on java to load

Requires a suitable runtime

Conventions expected by some tools can occasionally be irksome (to me)

C# (C Sharp)


It's not Java

It's similar to Java/C++

Core elements are standardized

Less resistance to shooting oneself in the foot / doing stupid things then Java but not as much as C++.

Gtk#, the binding of GTK+ to C# is available on the platforms I care about.


Most C# applications are probably tied to Microsoft Windows implementation via .NET or through Gnome related interfaces

Requires a runtime (e.g. .NET, Mono, or Dot GNU)

Requires just enough learning of it's differences from Java, for me to use it.



Portable and interpreted

Widely used across the WWW for server side scripting.

GTK+ bindings to PHP available and portable'ish

Simple language and member of the CBF.

The OOP increasingly resembles Java syntax and is just "enough" syntax to be useful without cramming.

Well documented


Local php.ini files can cause problems (how much can you assume?)

Needs a run time (php) of the right version (5)

php4/php5 is less common off web servers or developers systems



Great for writing prototypes

Several toolkits available that are fairly portable

Easy to work with and quit portable (and issues of portability well noted in the docs)

Large standard library

Implementations for the Java Virtual Machine and Microsoft .NET framework are available (if not as current as CPython) as well as the standard (C)Python implementation.


Requires a run time

I *hate* it's handling of regular expressions after being so used to Perl...

It's slower then native code

Interfacing with C /or C++ code can, uhh... Get interesting, from a portability perspective.

The program is the source



Handy pure OOP language

Great handling of regular expressions within the language itself, as opposed through importing an object oriented interface (i.e. as in Python/Java/C++)

Usually very "comfortable" to write.

Large standard library


It requires a run time and alternative compilers (e.g. xruby, ironpython) may be lacking in reliability or cause some features to be unavailable

The program is the source

Wishing Ruby 2 would come sooner....

Documentation can be irksome at times

It's slower then native code and even slower then Python (Ruby 1.8.x)
So far, I think I've been existing largly on salt today lol. Breakfast was Cashews and Peanut Butter toast. Lucnh, heh... A ton of potato chips :\

I managed to hit PG#1 fairly early today, I think the poor recruits were ready to pass out by the time, that we should have been starting training. I spent most of the time either making like a maniac on roller blades with a TMP. Or tagging along with Ez,Nick, and Caern in an element. It's been a rather dynamic day lool.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Spiders on a roll

Finally some time to catch up on my LJ, if I can keep my family at bay long enough to type anything meaningful >_>

Got off to a semi-early start, last night I was fairly wasted from the days ops and dropped off to sleep very quickly, all concepts of work largely forgotten until morning. Had to stop off today, Ma decided to upgrade cell phones, her new Motoorola W490 is quite nice. I don't particularly care much for cell phone though.

So far SAL1600 is 90% of fully operational, I've only had minor problems. One, my mic doesn't work and the sound drivers are pretty shitty, but on the upside seem to be much more stable then the older ones. Maybe my jokes were right after all, WHQL just means it's certified to suck and help crash your system. I was warned when installing the newest ones from the manufactor, that they weren't WHQL certified or what not, no biggy for me, because I know what kinda horse shit the company usually passes off for audio drivers lol. I really wish there was something like the Open Sound System for Windows, alas Windows sound technology is probably a good system. The only problem is, drivers!

Another issue is my Flock profile, I think it's probably a paths issue. On the old box Flock was installed into it's standard path of %ProgramFiles%\Flock (e.g. C:\Program Files\Flock) and my profile in %AppData%\Flock\Browser\Profiles\... where %AppData% was formally "C:Documents and Settings\Owner\Application Data". On my new install, everything is installed into a 'category' folder in P:\, e.g. P:\Games\RavenShield, P:\Network\Browsers\Flock. And likewise my use profile is in U:\Terry\. It's been somewhat problematic getting Windows to agree with me on such, especially the brain dead idea of it trying to copy a huge DVD sized ISO in U:\Terry\Desktop to C:\Documents and Settings\Terry\Desktop\ and bloating my C drive out. Maybe it is just my not knowing the management programs in Windows as well as UNIX or Windows XP is just totally brain damaged by design, I hope the latter but expect it is the former...

The software is willing but Windows is not so cooperative ^_^

The system has however been quite stable of late, pardoning IE7 crashing and a few other paths issues with my profile. I've also taken to having a cmd.exe window open on my second monitor most of th day. I find the DOS-inherited commands to be very child like and overly clumsy compared to any BSD or GNU/Linux based system I've used. The whole ruckus between copy, xcopy, and robocopy commands/programs on Windows is a nuts, I'll never understand it... Not after having lived with /bin/cp so long.

I managed to get into TG#1 for some games today, training with Nick, Caern, and Ez. It seems that I've taken care of a fair bot of training arrangements lately, all part of an evil plan of course.... Muahuahauah !!! Who knows, maybe this aging war horse will get to see more action soon ;-)

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Abort, Retry, Ignore -- not !!!

Windows XP is about 5% and still going strong on the game machine. Really, if I didn't need RvS and SWAT 4, I wouldn't even have XP on that machine lol.... My only dependency on Micro$oft is an OS that supports games --> I generally dislike console games.

0/ My current plan of action is to conduct the reformat/reinstall of XP.

1/ Verify that the S.O.B. boots... Install core drivers (GPU, Wifi)

2/ Strip her naked -- remove the "pre-installed" software and trial-ware, e.t.c.

3/ Boot into Knoppix Linux (LiveCD) and sort the partitions according to plan

4/ Install FreeBSD 7.0-Release and boot into it

5/ NFS mount the setup data from the file server (Vectra) and copy it to a shared FAT32 partition on SAL1600 (games machine).

6/ Boot into Windows XP MCE and install SP3

7/ Reboot and configure core system elements (e.g. get her on the network, behind a firewall, and setup the environment)

8/ Install software in the predefined order into the predefined locations, making adjustments as needed.

10/ Restore data from backups

11/ Customize her to the hilt: full command line environment; development tools, dual-monitors, desktop layout, etc.

XP is almost up to 40% already,so hopefully I can get started on the real work soon. Reinstall is easy, getting a working PC is a diff'rent story. So far everything is going smooth, and is probably planned out as good as a NASA mission ;-). Hehe, I've even got many of the firewall settings already prepaired. Hmm, I guess it is just fun to rip stuff apart and put it back together a better way at times.

I hope to have SAL1600 back online before morning, and with luck time to post a advance notice of training ops on TG#1... I'd like to reserve the server for a change if I can lol.


Hmm, haven't heard this song in awhile, but somehow I find it oddly appropriate of late...

You walk on like a woman in suffering
Won't even bother now to tell me why
You come alone, letting all of us savor the moment
Leaving me broken another time
You come on like a bloodstained hurricane
Leave me alone, let me be this time
You carry on like a holy man pushing redemption
I don't want to mention, the reason I know

That I am stricken and can't let you go
When the heart is cold, there's no hope, and we know
That I am crippled by all that you've done
Into the abyss will I run

You don't know what your power has done to me
I want to know if I'll heal inside
I can't go on with a holocaust about to happen
Seeing you laughing another time
You'll never know why your face has haunted me
My very soul has to bleed this time
Another hole in the wall of my inner defenses
Leaving me breathless, the reason I know

That I am stricken and can't let you go
When the heart is cold, there's no hope, and we know
That I am crippled by all that you've done
Into the abyss will I run

Into the abyss will I run

You walk on like a woman in suffering
Won't even bother now to tell me why
You come alone, letting all of us savor the moment
Leaving me broken another time
You come on like a bloodstained hurricane
Leave me alone, let me be this time
You carry on like a holy man pushing redemption
I don't want to mention, the reason I know

That I am stricken and can't let you go
When the heart is cold, there's no hope, and we know
That I am crippled by all that you've done
Into the abyss will I run

Into the abyss will I run
I can't let you go
Yes I am stricken and can't let you go

-- Stricken, Disturbed
I've been prepping my destop for a reformat, including taking backups and prepairing software for reinstallation.

After presenting the choice of, A/ either I finish this or B/ I'm not going to work tomorrow until _after_ it is done; has finally cut the "!@#$%ing go to bed" shoutings to a more subdued amount. I can't stand being told when to go to bed, not by someone that does not know my body the way I do, and has such disregard for the amount of shit I need to get done, plus:

If you're going to help make my life hell, I'm not gonna be obligated to listen too a damn thing you say.

I've got almost 5gb of files; mostly installers, on the way to my file server. Basically everything from Abiword to zip.exe is laid out and ready for installation. So with luck, I can reformat the piece of shit... Setup a quick dual boot, mount the backups and copy them over to a FAT32 partition; install my drivers, install SP3, install my software, and setup the system. I've also taken the liberty of making a few change: more development tools and TeX Live 2007 for the type setting environment. I usually try to avoid compiling anything from source under Windows, like the plague. In my opinion, it really is that much of a pain in the ass... I do however like the toolchains around for my own use.

Under unix based systems, I don't mind compiling from source as long as I'm given something *decent* to work with. Like something that actually builds on a standard system without mucking with it, rather then a piece of crap that is only easy to build on the developers Foo Linux machine lol.

I need to fetch my XP disks, mouse driver disk, and wifi driver disk. But all in all, it shouldn't be to bad to carry this out. Just that it will probably take 6-8 hours and over a dozen reboots.... Oh man, how I love FreeBSD -- a reboot typically means a new kernel to boot from. Much less then that, and I've never had to reboot my systems (with the exception of one sound driver that needs to be in loader.conf)

Tomorrow is likely to be another day of ... Hmm, I can't actually think of a word for it, that doesn't stretch into multi-word profanities. But at least I *should* get off work at a decent hour. Today, I ended up leaving around ~1600Q or so. I can't stand my life, but there isn't a lot I can do to change it.

Since I'm not about to keel over and die, and resulting to quite drastic measures is further then I'm willing to go.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I'd love to murderlize them..... Rend'em limb from limb as they do my mind. Or in the immortal words of the Robot, 'Crush, Kill, Destroy!' But I can't bring my self to it... I know it's wrong...

*joke* Now if only I could find a hit man to do it for me. *joke*

Sometimes, I really wish I could let myself be cruel.... And threat people as they deserve without pity or remorse, destroy them bit by bit and let them rest in a hell of there own making.

My only relief from this hell hole, will be getting dragged out to work, and pushed into another hell on earth, until returning to this one.

the story of my life.... in 7 lines of code

while work to do:
      Sit and work --> all hell breaks loose

      Sit and do nothing --> everyone stops going nuts
      work to do += 1
      ;; loop forever in hell.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Nights writings...

It's become so painfully clear that I'm not going to get anything done today. In more ways then one, let us say.... I have managed however to end up on my laptop, on battery power, and in one hell of an uncomfortable typing position! Like normal, when I'm on battery power;I operate in text mode.

I don't care much for it's forms handling on this scale in Lynx, but I quite like that LiveJournal really is Lynx friendly!

I've been writing in Vim as usual, my ~/Documents/Personal/ folder grows day by day, the only semblence of order being YYYY-MM-DD.txt appended to file names. Often when I'm miserable or have very strong feelings, I'll sit and write if I can (unobserved). It is more relaxing then sitting quietly and letting my mind rage about in silence. In away, I blame it on my time in Bible Study. When I was 'free' enough of schedule to attend it, I did quite enjoy being apart of one of the local groups. During most of the 2~3 years I was around, the focus often rested on a King of Israel with the ability for expression. I remember we covered much of the time of David.

I really miss that, but my life just doesn't have the free time for it. It as always a bit of a hassle to complete each cycle, and at times pushed my abilities to refrain from nervisness; it was also a lot of fun. Hmmm, maybe someday I'll live to see it again.

As to my own writings, while it is far from being so wonderfuly composed. It does however, express what _I_ feel more clearly then anything else. If it didn't, I wouldn't bother adding another file to my home directory. In a lot of ways, I find English a poor language for such a purpose. English is well suited for precision of description in my opinion, but sorely lacking in many other regards.... Mmm, not really looking forward to tomorrow, anyway you slice it, it's rather likely to be a day I would rather forget about. At least *hopefully* I'll have the weekend free; my mind wonders so much as I sit here, brain a drift with only my nimble fingers as its output. Hmm, why does everything seem to be I/O bound, even in the 21st century >_>

Training Afterdark

A tad annoyed, been doing some of my private training in RvS. My times are almost a minute longer then my best, while that's still quite quick (I set the time marker for 5min; and completed it in less then 3:45) it's still very slow... I've always chose that map because of the extreme CQB. Did a couple good runs and even got time to bring out a variety of weapons: MP5/10A2, MP5A4, TMP, P90, Mac 9/11, and the MTAR-21. But I'm still very far from satisfied with my performance. I fear, that I am starting to get old :\

Two things that really pissed me off, the P90 and my faithful P228 pistol. It's like, you fire off a burst into an area the size of a mouth, the target is chest sized, so close that if it was real life, you could almost extend your arms and bayonet the S.O.B. But in RvS, it's still possible to fire in bursts, watching the count of rounds fired increase: 2..4..7.. and guess what? Magically all of the bullets strike the wall behind the X-Ray, but none actually hit them... Leaving you with 44 rounds in a P90 and a dead body, that is not the enemy!!!

It's total bullshit. Although, I must admit in RvS, the game has always given me a feeling that the rear sights are on target, while the front sights are aimed at your toes instead... Tonight was an unbelievably bad display on RvS's part, I've never considered the games P90 to be deead on balls accurate but this was just a joke. I've picked off head-shots at range with the games Mac 9/11, and the P90 is dozens of times more accurate in that game.

The second thing to piss me off, is I shot an X-Ray square in the chest with a P228, 9x19mm Jacket Hollow Point round... Round penetrated and exploded the barrel behind him. While the JHP are still capable of penetrating tangos. I can't help but wonder, why a 9x19mm JHP round from a P228 will do the trick, when a FMJ 9x19mm round from my MP5A4 wouldn't.

What irks me even more so, for "training games" we used to round people up, go find explosive barrels, and take turns shooting them. Walk up to the barrel, fire a round (or two), and run off before the next Rct tries it. Often we use the 5.7mm AP Army (FN Five-Seven) because RvS gives it less stopping power then some SPITBALL from Romania! We've also tested with 5.56x45mm weapons and various 9x19mm pistols using full metal jacket rounds.

The concept that a P228 firing 9x19mm JHP can be more dentimental to a (thick skinned!) explosive barrels contents then the G36K's 5.56x45mm round, just begs for a physicist to explain these ballistics >_>

Geeze, why can't they ever make a *decent* tactical game that is realistic?
HOme from work at least and some good news, I only have to work 2 jobs tomorrow instead of 3... One of our clients had her baby today, so there is more important stuff to worry about ;-). Both mother and child doing well as to everyones prayers.

For me this is doubly good news.... If work was a river, I would be drowning in it, and my family would be pushing my head under.

I didn't really mind having 3 jobs planned for tomorrow, I usually only have to deal with one. What does piss me off, is when I got into this business... It was to help pay for my high school and save some cash for later. Fast forward several years, I could be almost out of college by now instead of still in HS, and she ain't saved a cotton pickin' dime along the way. And the only way I'll likely ever get out of this business, is my life turned up side down, in ways I don't want lol.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Managed to catch the last half of Crimson Tide. I haven't seen the movie in ages, was nice to actually get to see something though... Once everyone else is asleep, it's actually possible to get stuff done, so I rarely watch TV lol.

One thing I do know, I can't stand the idea of serving on a submarine. At least if a service ship goes down, you might have get off the ship in one piece, deal with the undertow trying to suck you under, and not freeze to death before CSAR arrives... But at least you've got some chance. ON a sub, if something happens hundreds of feet below, ya a tad bit fucked.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Finally.... I managed to get shaved, not like there is much else I can get done. One nice thing, there are two or three things I can do under almost any condition, as long as I can keep my eyes on what I'm doing that is. With luck, maybe my family will settle down for awhile, so I can actually get something DONE.

I almost never shave, because I just don't have the damn time. In this case, it's been so long since I last found the time to shave. That I was starting to resemble King Leonidas in 300, only much shorter and less muscle bound lol. Willow was staring at me as if to say, "wtf happened to you?". Heck, I barely recognize myself now... It's been that long lol. I don't usually look like a short-haired ookie out of desire, but out of necessity. There is only so much shit that you can cram into a small stretch of time and still be ready to rumble in the morning.

Especially in this place !!!!

Nearly an hour later with razor, scissors, and electric razor, it's finally done. People always try to pawn off electric razors on me but I'd rather use something that works after the first week. With how long it is before the problem of 'need to' and 'have time to' coincide, an old time straight razor would actually be most convenient

Hit the DVD Collection for something to watch, I'll probably end up watching them each 3 times before Monday.... Because I'd actually like to see the 'entire' movie when I start watching one. To be honest, the reason I largely gave up on watching TV. Is because whenever something decent was on, I never got to watch the frigging thing!!! ---> Gotta love family, especially family that thinks you're a servant.

Frustration factor := (3.14159265 ^ 2)*(1024^64)

Since it seems to be to much to ask, too be able to work on things in peace in this hell hole. I've closed my terminal for the time being.

What the hell do I have to do, in order to get work done? Buy a rat fucking shotgun and take hostages?! No wait, that wouldn't work, my family doesn't give a flying fuck about anyone else. I sat through a five and a half hour project meeting... and despite the insane length of the meeting. I should have had the first milestone completed the day after the meeting, instead fast forward almost two weeks.... The first phase of the damn thing isn't even complete yet.

If I actually had decent conditions to work in, things would be COMPLETE by now. But no, my family can't leave be alone to work in peace.

I think if I as about five years old again, I would wait for my family to be doing something.... Go take out a large pot from the kitchenand a pair of equally large wooden spoons. Then take a belt and make a sling for the pot (for ease of marching). And then walk back and forth across the room, banging the spoons on the pot while shouting

"Now whose working, now whose working".

As absolutely childish as doing that would be, I think that is about the only thing my family would understand.... Without having to take very drastic measures to get the point across... (e.g. using pepper spray, a TASER, or even deadly force e.t.c.),

I fear, one day I'll look back upon my memories of this place and cry, "Just another picture to burn".

distracting music

Hmm... You know, the radio can be rather distracting when coding lol

Well, Becky was a beauty from south Alabama.
Her Daddy had a heart like a nine pound hammer.
Think he even did a little time in the slammer.
What was I thinkin'?

She snuck out one night an' met me by the front gate,
Her Daddy came out a-wavin' that 12-guage
We tore out the drive, he peppered my tailgate.
What was I thinkin'?

Oh, I knew there'd be hell to pay.
But that crossed my mind a little too late.

'Cause I was thinkin' 'bout a little white tank top,
Sittin' right there in the middle by me.
An' I was thinkin' 'bout a long kiss,
Man, just gotta get goin', where the night might lead.
I know what I was feelin',
But what was I thinkin'?
What was I thinkin'?

By the County line, the cops were nippin' on our heels,
Pulled off the road an' kicked it in four-wheel.
Shut off the lights an' tore through a cornfield.
What was I thinkin'?

At the other side, she was hollerin': "Faster."
Took a dirt road, had the radio blastin'.
Hit the honky-tonk for a little close dancin'.
What was I thinkin'?

Oh, I knew there'd be hell to pay.
But that crossed my mind a little too late.

'Cause I was thinkin' 'bout a little white tank top,
Sittin' right there in the middle by me.
An' I was thinkin' 'bout a long kiss,
Man, just gotta get goin', where the night might lead.
I know what I was feelin',
But what was I thinkin'?
What was I thinkin'?

When a mountain of a man with a "Born To Kill" tattoo,
Tried to cut in, I knocked out his front tooth.
We ran outside, hood slidin' like Bo Duke.
What was I thinkin'?

I finally got her home at a half past two, later.
Daddy's in a long chair sittin' on the driveway,
Put it in park as he started my way.
What was I thinkin'?
Oh, what was I thinkin'?
Oh, what was I thinkin'?

Then she gave a "Come an' get me grin."
An' like a bullet, we were gone again.

'Cause I was thinkin' 'bout a little white tank top,
Sittin' right there in the middle by me.
An' I was thinkin' 'bout a long kiss,
Man, just gotta get goin' where the night might lead.
I know what I was feelin',
But what was I thinkin'?
What was I thinkin'?

I know what I was feelin', but what was I thinkin'?

-- Dierks Bentley - What Was I Thinkin' (Brett Beavers/Dierks Bentley/Deric Ruttan)

JUst what I always wanted

I wonder why, I never found it online earlier lol.

Writer's Block: A Fruity Synthesis

If you could create a hybrid of any two fruits in the world, what would they be and why? Describe this new fruit (its name, taste, color, ect.)

Submitted By mangostarrr
Live Journals Writer's Block

Actually someone already has done it for me, it's called a Clementine.

Why I would go for that instead of something else? I don't think you could actually cross anything with a Pineapple and still have it taste as good as the original... let along still be worth eating stand alone;-)

Friday, August 15, 2008

Before another round of Wesnoth...

It's been abit since I've updated my LJ, haven't really had much time for it :\

The past two weeks I've largely been workin' my ass off either on various projects, at work (grrr!), or training the days away in the servers. At least the training ops are both fun and effective uses of time, the rest... Well let's just say I hate my job lol. The number of projects I've been butter-flying across is getting a bit out of hand, mainly because of the amount of time I can afford to spend on them during the day.

I may end up changing "schools" so to speak, in the near future. I'm not really looking forward to it, because although it should speed this shit up quite a lot. I've still got the same problems as always --- a family to butt in and working most of the week. Wouldn't it be wonderful to have a vacation lol, I would probably end up catching up on homework +S.

In the mean time I've been playing a lot of Wesnoth. A few years ago, on one of my 'few' vacations... I was lucky enough to spend my time split between working, learning another programming language, and a new (to me) game called the Battle for Wesnoth. It's a great game, a bit J. R. R. Tolkien inspired in my humble opinion, but a very fun Turn-Based Strategy game. I recently picked it up again, for lack of a better time passing... The games quite omni-platform but I've only got it installed on my FreeBSD powered laptop. I've been looking through the info and working on a custom campaign for it. Although a bit out of place for Wesnoth, it's an original plot, well at least original in the sense that I've never followed that kind of High Fantasy in the first place >_>

I'm quite a bit more of a "Sci Fi Guy", I prefer fiction and have the book-inhaling habits to prove it hehe. Most of the times I read, I usually go through 50~120 pages a day easily. Dune took a few days but I read enormous amount of it per sitting. That's one thing I really miss, getting to sit down and READ a book. Most of the time I read these days, it's either on the web or if lucky enough to have a real book in hand. It's usually a book on something technical, e.g. TCP/IP. I love books, reading beats TV watching for me, because there can be much greater depth to it. Not to mention that 300~500 pages of novel, spanning 3 or more books (a trilogy) gives one a bit more leeway for time. As much as I love TV and Movies, I really dislike some of the hack-jobs that people have done... Just look at the movie ALIENS, the "classic" version that we've watched for years. And the *proper* version with so many deleted scenes and cut-out footage restored. The rat bastards practically destroyed the entire story!!! Although, I admit the classic cut they've released so often is still a good movie. But the special edition is a great movie!

Hmm, some days I wish I could win the lotto or something. It would be certainly nice, instant shopping spree for what books I've missed over the past decade lol. Dang dogs been chewing on my copy of Vision of the Future, luckily not to much damage... Timothy Zahn's Thrawn trilogy is one of my favorite set of Star Wars novels, the Hand of Thrawn duology (that it is apart of) also being quite nice. If I recall correctly, Vision of the Future is the one where Luke Skywalker finally purposed to Mara Jade.

After who knows how long people were waiting to see if that would ever happen, it finally did lol.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Incredibly tired

I've had a lot on my mind lately... At least for me it's somewhat hard not to realize how far I am from my objectives. Working into the ground, on all flanks, with no sign of relief in view. No matter what I do, there never seems to be any headway made :\

I think I'll play a bit of Wesnoth for tonight. It's not like I'm going to get to doing anything meaningful tonight, I'll be lucky to get to sleep in peace......

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Not exactly a movie that I would choose on my own, but so fucking funny it was worth cooperation lol. Ok, these two couples are shopping... The pregnant mothers on one end of the store and the fathers on the other side. While the guys are going buy, there is a dude in a "Arnie" Dinosaur suite pitching a sale to some kids -- making fun of Barny the Dinosaur of doom. When the two guys walk buy, he tries to sell them the video:

Marty: I'm not gonna buy your damn video!
Arnie: But the kids will love it...
Marty: My kids will hate it because they think your show sucks!
Arnie: [after a long pause] Oh.
Samuel Faulkner: Thanks anyway.
Arnie: Oh sure, no hard feelings okay?
Marty: Alright.
[He and Samuel walk away]
Arnie: Ah, ya cheap shit.
Marty: What did you say?
Arnie: Oh gee, I didn't say nothing mister, you must be hearing things. Bye bye, Arnie loves you. Ya penis-head.
Marty: Now I heard that!
Arnie: Heard what?
Marty: I heard what you said!
Arnie: I didn't say nothing... Ya fat ass pussy.

And the two guys end up diving at him, three way brawl with "Arnie" cussing them out through the whole thing, until the women come over and find the "children" fighting. hilarious !

Internet Whiteboards --> no java --> java but nice ui

Special thanks to [SAS]_Sgt_Medic.

I think I can use these for a few meetings in the future lol.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Days log

I think I ended up walking around the grocery store more then coding... As soon as I was found wide awake. That generally proved to be a wash out, at lest I got some of the menial work done on the current module. Why on earth I'm working through things in the same order as the flow chart, I dunno... Maybe because it saves the easy work for the end lol.

Managed to *eventually* make it into Training Grounds #1 to work with Jonsi. Pardoning 3 r 4 people and a website to deal with, training chatter with the NCOs, making like an omni-present on 3 forums, and the like. Once we finally got ready op for the training, we got delayed by more people joining, and NCOs out to do some synchronization, to the point that Jonsi was only there for about 10 minute lol. Several hours later of drillin' with NCO/Rct/CO I'm like, "I stopped N hours ago but no one noticed" haha. We did have some good training though.

I also managed to feed my interest in computers, inhaling some information about the old ENIAC or Electronic Numerical Integrator And Computer, the German Z3, and the British code breaking Colossus computers. As well as wishing that I could visit the Deutsches Museum, because a replica of the Z3 is supposed to be there in M√ľnchen :-).

What can I say, I love computers lol.

One eye open, then two eyes online.

Was to darn tired to get coding, so I went to bed and figured I'd get up later around 0100-0200 and start after a short nap. Fell straight a sleep to dream land. Woke up a quarter after six. I've been on "power up" cycle since then. Haha, just moved from my desk to sitting in bed with the laptop, now Willow is pissed at me. But I think my lower back muscles will be more pissed at me later. Anyway, laid back down and tried to get my brain back online.

Ironically I eventually fell asleep and got up several more times, >_> all short cat-naps but that's normal; all the way to dreaming about reaching my LJ and starting the day off. It's generally nice that most of my dreams were fairly normal, as far as normal goes for me lol. I finally got up and out of bed a little after 0800.

No one has any idea how badly I would've liked to see the sunrise but alas, impossible to break stealth for it.

Dang it, Willow just took off barking... Probably some poor schlep on their way to work. *mutters* Thanks a lot Willow, wake up the whole house when I try to get up early and code before they do. I guess this is what I get for not letting her have the entire bed ^_^.

Dogs !!!

With any luck the factual and honest answer that I've went to bed, woke up around 0615, 0730, and 0800, then hit the code will be believed -- this time I have not coded the whole night through lol.... Thank GOD it's been awhile since my last ~2300-0700 run, they are killers on actually getting any sleep!

Sunday, August 10, 2008

WWWeb nightmare from hell pages

I've just been through a waking semi-nightmare.

With the ISP change, my mothers had to deal with updating e-mail address across a number of accounts. It's been weeks and the scheduling as finally sorted out for me to help deal with the various mailing lists and accounts from companies (adverts, news, sales papers, blah blah). All the time with me muttering how easy it should be for anyone to change such things, well guess what? I was blood wrong !!!!

Half of the mailing lists had to be unsubscribed and resubscribed, if there was a way to update it, the only practical means of doing so would be to e-mail the mailer program a 'help' message and see if it responds. Fluttering across the messages and the associated websites (where findable or Googlable) ranged from useless, to down right worthless. Some where actually pretty good, like the anti-virus data, figures they would make it simple ^_^. While others, it was just pitiful.... Hell on one -- belonging to a fairly well known company in it's category in fact. When submitting the form information, it through up an unhanded null pointer exception popup. Complete with a fucking stack trace and some paths data, for crying out fucking loud.... Showing any Joe blow submitting form data on the website, a bleeding stack trace!!!!

I've gone across numerics websites, ranging from looking nice to rather bloated. Aside from a bit of masturbation with JavaScript, the pages source code was the only decent thing about many of the websites I saw... Overall website usability was totally awful, like trying to back a tracker-trailer out of an outhouse without harming anything.

I know it takes a lot of work to make an attractive website, but geeze. How about actually making it a website worth visiting while ya at it fellas?

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Ended up as good as passed out cold... No work done, but I finally got some sleep lol.

Managed to catch the end of The Matrix. I like the end game, although I must admit the gun fights are pretty tame compared to Equilibrium (a real must see!)

finish later.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Another day

Another day of hell almost over.

Another day of it sure to come.

Just once, I wish

I wish I could soar.

Spread my wings and fly, leave the past gone far behind.

And look down upon all that should come my way...

Another day of hell almost over,

Another day of it sure to come.

Still fightin' it off one blow at a time, bit by nit.

As they nail another one in my coffin.

Just hoping I'll drop, 'fore they do.

Oh God, why am I here?

It's just another day of pain

Just another battle to come roarin' through these halls.

Leavin' nothing behind but flames in its wake.

Another day of hell almost gone by,

Another trip through the flames waitin' for me on the other side

As I choke on the ashes, lungs burning from the flumes

Of a day nearly gone.

My song for the day

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
how did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey’s head?

This is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin’ out

This is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
Criminal record says I broke in twice
I must’ve done it half a dozen times

I wonder if it’s too late
Should I go back and try to graduate?
Life’s better now than it was back then
If I was them, I wouldn’t let me in
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye


Remember the old arcade
Blew every dollar that we ever made
The cops see us hanging out
They said somebody went and burned it down

We used to listen to the radio
And sing along with every song we know
We said someday we’d find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel

Kim's the first girl I kissed
I was so nervous that I nearly missed
She’s had a couple of kids since then
I haven’t seen her since God knows when
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on the bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

I miss that town
I miss the faces
You can't erase
You can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it

If I could relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me...

Am I finally surpised or just about to pass out?

Ok, now I really know that I've got to dig up a copy of the C++ standards (both 1998 and 2003) and run a personal sanity check or C++ has finally succeeded in shocking me. Tested each of these with g++ 4.2.1 using the -std=c++98 -pedantic switches for the sake of quickness.

    int f=true;
    bool b=15; // 15 is demoted to 1
    enum foo_t { ONE,TWO };
    enum foo_t spam=ONE;    // ok
    enum foo_t ham=false;    // error
    enum foo_t eggs=1;   // error

In C the enum would be little better then making a pair of preprocessor defines for 0 and 1 and 'foo_t' being much like an equivalent to a typedef to one of the common integer types. In C++ enums create new types, that's nice because it actually forces you to use one of the enum values, making the last line of the example (assigning a foo_t an int) becomes an error in C++ rather then (likely) a typo in C.

That makes good sense to me and I like it, ok.

Most C implementations that I've seen that have a stdbool.h usually settles things as defining bool as an int either via reliance on typedef or the preprocessor, then defines true/false as 1/0. So there is really nothing to enforce a bool to equal anything else in common C, although I've never seen an undesired result... But in C++, bool is done as a fundamental type.... not an afterthought. So the thing I don't understand is why restrict newly created enumerations to there sane values, shooting off a compiler error if something odd happens. But allow the built in booleans to be 'almost' automatically converted like regular numerics? (apparently similar to the usual promotion/demotion rules)

bool isSomething = false; // becomes 0
isSomething++; // becomes 1
isSomething -= 500; // strangely becomes 1
isSomething--; // is an error using this operator
isSomething = isSomething -1; // becomes 0

I find it rather odd that things seem to work this way, the only logical reason I could see for it is compatibility with those in a '#define true 1' world. Personally I don't have a problem with it, I just find it odd. Maybe if I nabbed a copy of the C++ standard it would make more sense. I'm familiar enough with reading the C standard (and enjoy it) but I've never managed to get a copy of the relevant C++ standards :\. Heh, then again until recent months I haven't really touched C++ in ages... But it has been encroaching on things I normally use C or Perl for doing.

Or maybe I just need some damn __SLEEP__

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Just two more days of work until the weekend.... I hope the "getting off early" streak continues !!!

Because I've got a mega-shitload of stuff to do after work lol.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

If youre tellin me Im not on fire
Youre just preachin to the choir
Ive gotten dull as old barbed wire from livin
Last night I watched the evening news
It was the same ol nothin new
It should have cut me right in two
But it didnt
I dont know why it didnt

But I wanna feel somethin
Somethin thats a real somethin
That moves me, that proves to me Im still alive
I wanna heart that beats and bleeds
A heart thats bustin at the seams
I wanna care, I wanna cry, I wanna scream
I just wanna feel somethin

If youre tellin me thats just how it is
I dont buy it cause once I was kissed
By a red-headed girl with cherry lips
On her porch when I was sixteen
And I felt it somewhere in my soul and time stood still and I couldnt let go
I cant tell you cause I dont know how I got so cold
When did I get so cold

I just wanna feel somethin
Somethin thats a real somethin
That moves me, that proves to me Im still alive
Run my fingers through your fingers, across your face and through your hair
And close my eyes and breathe you in like air
I just wanna feel somethin

I hate that Im jaded and I make you cry
But still you stick around me, only God knows why
Damn it all to hell, Im done
Cause I dont like what Ive become
So come here, baby
Come here, baby

I just wanna feel somethin
Somethin thats a real somethin
That moves me, that proves to me Im still alive
Run my fingers through your fingers, across your face and through your hair
And close my eyes and breathe you in like air
I just wanna feel somethin

I hate that Im jaded and I make you cry
But still you stick around me, only God knows why
Damn it all to hell, Im done
Cause I dont like what Ive become
So come here, baby
Come here, baby

Come here, baby

Artist: Trace Adkins
Song: I Wanna Feel Something
Album: American Man: Greatest Hits Vol II

Monday, August 4, 2008


enough stuff to do to choke a frickin' horse....
work tomorrow
and to damn tired to do any of it :\

Writer's Block: Immigration

If you had to immigrate from your current home, where in the world would you choose to go?

Submitted By [info]purplemer3
Live Journals Writer's Block

I guess if I was forced to immigrate to another county, there are only about 3 places to consider as a final resting place.


Because I know a few people out that way, a fairly large portion of the population speaks English, the changes in laws are easy enough to figure out, there are lots of places to go fishing, and the women ain't so bad either >_>

Great Britain

Again, I know a few people out that way, also have a relative who is originally from England. It's about as English speaking a country as your going to find outside the United States of America. Plus the differences in lingo and customs of our cultures are not too mind bogglingly different.


A few people there that I would love to visit, one in particular that I could just imagine the two of us staggering home half drunk ^_^. I've always been quite fascinated with the country and it's culture, not to mention that the "Bart Simpson method" is probably the only way that I would ever learn to speak German *decently*.

I can usually manage well enough with a dictionary, but I try to avoid speaking in German as much as possible... I can't do the language justice with my American tongues vocalizations :\

I would love one day, to have a chance to travel the globe a bit and visit other countries frequently: Canada, the UK, Germany, Italy (I'm half Italian and love the food), Denmark, Norway, Japan (a must visit!), and probably a few others as well. But when it comes to permanently living in another country, what can I say, I am an American at the end of the day. Sure I'd love to spend lots of times else where, why not? But I can't fathom the idea of what it would be like to never again set foot on my homelands sore again...

My stomach would miss the USA too.

As a good friend has often said, the food over here is very much a salad bowl. And it really does make sense because America is a nation of immigrates, who most surely brought their tastes and cooking styles along with them :-).

Sunday, August 3, 2008

I spent about five and a half hours in a project meeting today. So maybe it is a good thing I didn't have the second set of charts done... We did managed to settle on the important stuff needed before we could continue, along with a couple of good ideas coming from it. The only bad part was it took so dang long to complete lol.
Crud... After 0400 already and still not finished with everything :\

Oh well, at least I had time to inhale a bit of GnuPG hehe.
Just caught the end of Iron Eagle on TV, it's about as much of a cheesy unrealistic '80s action flick as ya can get. But it is the only decent cheesy action flick with lots of air action that I now of >_>.

The whole jist of the movie is a kid skipping town with a pair of USAF F-16s to rescue his father, and ending up single handly saving the day while dancing beteen AAA and MiGs, although how any one could call those things MiGs without being drunk, is totally beyond me. Those airframes just screen Dassault Mirage! The movies never the less enjoyable, as long as one can forget a few bits of reality, kick back and relax that is.

It reminds me that I've never really found a flight simulation that I like. Everyone that I've ever played, either boils down to being to arcade like, not my bag, or proves that a keyboard and joystick are a poor substitute for a real aircrafts cockpit lol. I like flight sims but they don't like me I guess :\. I've never really had much taste for modern missile based combat either, just a gun-fighter at heart I guess... And I have *never* found a flight sim game that had an AI that could really dog fight, get past the missles and they are just toast. Although it's a very arcade-like game, Ace Combat 3: Electrosphere was actually quite fun, just wish I had a Japanese copy of it... Most particularly the mission where one has to fly in hot pursuit of the X-49 Night Raven through a tunnel system, leading the player into a later level where one duals the ultra-nimble aircraft inside the caverns below.

The fun part of course is getting through the level at high speed without crashing, then moving on to shoot it out with the Night Raven for an A ;-). The occasional duals with the UI-4054 Aurora, looks like one of our spyplanes but flies like a jetfighter from hell lol. Some of the few times that the computers proven to be a challenge I guess :\. I eventually gave up on flight sims in general, do to lack of anything fun that didn't go to either extreme (the arcade Vs where is my simpod problem). Hmm, before I quit though I remember when one of the console based flight sims came out, more realistic then most consolers but still to arcadey for my tastes. When my brother watched me fly one of the attack fighter missions, he described me as a lethal S.O.B. while I was making waves, crazy wall crawling spider at work xD. But it's been *years* since I've actually played any flight-based games seriously.

If I ever found a game that I could enjoy and not dislike, maybe I'd get back into flight simulations someday. But none just seem to strike a good balance :\. And I flibbin' hate air-to-air missiles! In a lot of ways, I think the truest forms of air combat began dying out after World War II, disappearing into the post Vietnam era... Where a pilots skill is as important then his technology, if not even more so. Who knows, maybe technology will one day return fighter pilots to more dog fighting, less ground attack jobs.

Either way, I'm not likely to ever fly let along get a pilots license, and my Dream Girl is already retired anyway.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Finally a good swat game

After a stream of very crappy games, fillding with more then a few players that could pass themselves off as tactically incompetent... We finally had one really solid round on PG#3. I took EL on the half way house map, in a formation of Chris, [SAS]_Big12, [SAS]_Spidey01, and Snorr. We moved us swiftly into the buildings front entry point, Snorr watching the side door, Chris and Big forking off to secure the halves. A little application of cover later, we've secured the area. Left Snorr behind to cover the twin double doors into the chapel, while the rest of us headed for the pool room. A quick bang & clear, wedge the doors and secure the contacts while having guns on every point of threat! --> The proper way. We moved back, setup Red Fire Team and Blue Fire Team each on one double door with bangs, blow and go --> chapel secured, door to hallway wedged, all angels covered... We headed upstairs and settled in for entry to the big room up top.

Normally I would plan such a thing out before hand, but with the noob patrol on the other team I didn't bother. We did a smooth assault synced to my GO GO GO command: Bang going in, Chris entering and blitzing RIGHT and clearing to the bathroom, Big storming forward and then moving RIGHT to cover the exit door. Me blasting through and heading RIGHT, joining Chris at the bathroom door with a flash bang ready, and Snorr heading forward, striaght to the wall and securing a point to cover contacts in the room. Chris and I kicked into the bathroom with a flashbang as Snorr and Big setup cover. On my "CLEAR" we started zip-cuffing contacts, under protective cover all the way, then set it up for an entry on the next room.

"ROOM CLEAR, that's the way it's done baby"

Kicked into the next room with a flashbang, forking the element off again on the fly, Big taking the far door, Me taking point for the next room, Chris flipping in a bang as I popped the door, while Snorr covering Bigs back, we secured the next room, while trying to minize risk of getting flanked. Secure contacts, mopped up, moved out to the hallway... And BINGO, a plan hits me.

I ordered Chris and Big to move down the stairs to the corner and stand by for an entry on the cafeteria. While Me and Snorr circled around back to the other side to the rear of the kitchen. A quick "GO GO GO" and both teams rolled in their flash bangs, quickly storming through to each teams sector for a mop up.

And then a friendly game afterwards >_>

[click to enlarge]
Operators playing cards around the table

Da noobs go in, them noobs hit the hard deck, pros go in, dead noobs disconnect while the pros go on the complete the mission, smooth as a babies behind hehe.
East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run.

Keep your foot hard on the pedal. Son, never mind them brakes.
Let it all hang out 'cause we got a run to make.
The boys are thirsty in Atlanta and there's beer in Texarcana.
And we'll bring it back no matter what it takes.

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run.

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run.

Ol' Smokey's got them ears on and he's hot on your trail.
He aint gonna rest 'til you're in jail.
So you got to dodge 'im and you got to duck 'im,
you got to keep that diesel truckin'.
Just put that hammer down and give it hell.

East bound and down, loaded up and truckin',
we're gonna do what they say can't be done.
We've got a long way to go and a short time to get there.
I'm east bound, just watch ol' "Bandit" run.

-- East Bound and Down, Jerry Reed

Rockin' and Rollin'

Spent most of my day working on a couple of flow charts for tomorrows project meeting. I really wish I had the time to setup a proper presentation but the most important stuff is ready. If all the concerned parties are on time, we should even get done fairly quickly I think. I've had concept work and test cases stuffed in my brain for the past 2 or 3 days but no real time to sit down and work it out. I think, if I see another flow chart, I am gonna kick something. I've found Dia quite nice for doing simple diagrams and charts, it's enough like GIMP that the learning curve is almost null. It could do with a little more refinement in spots but hey, if it lets me get stuff done in a fraction of the time... I can put up with the stuff I don't like (mainly to do with text operations).

I'm working on it in my spare time, after work, after [SAS] operations, and along side my own projects, so effective use of my time is a plus hehe.

Some good news in [SAS] finally hit, I've been waiting for awhile now... But it was well worth it, seems several great NCOs are leading the charge in the indicated direction. I've left the details to others, since the emphasis was on getting it "done" rather then doing it well, and I'm just the schmuck who will probably have to deal with any later maintenance lol. But at least it's done....

Managed to get a little bit of RvS time in, I think my recent expedition into the SWAT4 server has thrown my movements off. In RvS, things tend to act very fast and chunky but in SWAT4 they tend to feel much smoother, if slow by comparison. I was rather surprised to have around accuracy rankings in the 60s of hit percentages. While I rarely miss in SWAT4, RvS requires more, should I say. "Shoot the fucker, shoot him again, and shoot'em some more" in order to combat latency and super tangos. RvS is nice in that 2 rounds will drop almost any enemy, if you can get the blasted hits to register cleanly over the network.

In the course of my days web surfing I found an interesting language, called erlang. It looks like it would be worth poking around, I just wish I had the time :-(. But I'm just to busy with other stuff and can't offerd to "cram one more" language between my ears... Rubber banding between C, C++, PHP, Perl, and Bourne for a couple days is, uhh.. a bit odd :\

I really do like to learn different languages, the only problem is time spent inhaling documentation and memorizing syntax / interfaces. Much of my thinking i fairly language independent, so I really don't have trouble picking up other languages. Python for example took a couple of hours at the most and ~2 days of "play testing" it on light problems before I was comfortable using it on a more serious project. Although I do admit, when it comes to expressing ideas I do really draw upon what I know.

For expedience of expression and to actually be able to read it at a glance. I'll often mangle English and common constructs together, forming a document local style of writing whatever pops up often. Basically writing it in a way that just lets me say what I need to remind myself of later, and read it quickly when I do have to look stuff up. I can usually read things at a fairly quick rate, my eyes scan it and break things down, parsing it into the elements I comprehend and working on the rest as I go along. So the strange code-lish style writing usually speeds things up, since my eyes can parse the flow of it more readily then a few extra paragraphs of contemporaneity English, which means I can also "home in" on the parts of interest and quickly discern what I need to read and what I can ignore when grepping my text.

Sometimes, I wonder if I'm just mad as a hatter lol.